A Life Without Regrets
by Little.Miss.Xanda
Summary: How I wish, in my dying hour, to be with all of you once more. When one has lost everything they hold dear, when one loses themselves with every breath they take, when one's regrets are far too great to bear - death is a a blessing. Death brings with it the hope of finding happiness once more, to meet once more and resolve past regrets.
1. How I Wish

**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J.K. Rowling. No money is being made.

 **Written for the Challenge '200 Prompts, in 100 Stories!'**

 **I picked as Additional Rewards:** The Founders - Godric, Rowena, Helga, Salazar - 2 points

 **It will consist of a small multi-chapter story.**

 **Prompt** **s** **for** **this** **chapter:**

 **Character –** Godric

 **Other –** The Lake

* * *

 **Chapter 1 – How I Wish**

How I wish I could go back and change things. If I had the chance, I would call my younger self a fool. Such a _fool_. Now lying here, taking my last breaths – and they are my last, no matter how much the healer tells me otherwise – I would give everything I have to change it.

My friend, my brother, will you ever be able to forgive me? If I had any strength left in me, I would search the world for you. I would, with my last breath, ask for your forgiveness. Even though I know there is no absolution for what I did, for what I've _said_.

" _They are a danger to us!" Salazar insisted._

" _What would you know about muggles?" Godric growled, only to pale immediately after he realized what he had said._

How could I ever have uttered such words? How could I have forgotten, even in the heat of the moment, what had happened to you?

I knew you still had nightmares about that day. I knew the smell of burning embers still made you nauseous. I knew you still heard the screams of your mother while the fire consumed her.

So you see? I know that you couldn't possibly forgive me. Though, as you so often said, I am an arrogant, hopelessly naive fool – maybe that is why I would ask to be forgiven for the unforgivable.

We should have listened to our sisters. _I_ should have listened to them. My stubbornness, my _arrogance_ , broke our family.

How I wish to be back in the days where we were young, and so full of hope and dreams.

" _This is it!" Godric grinned from ear to ear. "This is the perfect place."_

" _Here?" Salazar frowned, looking around. "There's nothing here."_

" _Sure there is," Godric exclaimed. "Look at that forest over there, and this amazing lake. Think about the possibilities." Godric cajoled, almost vibrating in his excitement._

" _It is a nice place," Helga agreed. "I thought we were looking for a building, though."_

" _We can build it ourselves!" Godric's grin grew even wider, and the others hid their smiles. Sometimes Godric was nothing more than a big child._

" _It would involve a lot of work." Rowena cautioned, always the voice of reason._

" _Lucky that we don't shy away from hard work," Salazar remarked. No matter how much he complained, Salazar was always the first to give in to Godric._

" _It's going to be great! I just know it!" Godric laughed_.

I can still remember the countless nights we camped beside that lake. Even after our home was built, we would still go outside and sleep beneath the stars. The best memories of my life take place right beside that lake; all of you with me, talking about everything and nothing, sharing secrets, dreams, fears.

Now that I feel my last breath approaching, I wish only to be there with all of you once more.

How I wish I had lived a life without regrets.


	2. In My Dying Hour

**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J.K. Rowling. No money is being made.

 **Written for the Challenge '200 Prompts, in 100 Stories!'**

 **I picked as Additional Rewards:** The Founders - Godric, Rowena, Helga, Salazar - 2 points

 **It will consist of a small multi-chapter story.**

 **Prompt** **s** **for** **this** **chapter:**

 **Character –** Helga

 **Other –** Astronomy Tower

* * *

 **Chapter 2 – I** **n** **M** **y** **D** **ying** **H** **our**

In my dying hour, my thoughts go back to a time long past. To when I last saw all of you. I will never forgive myself for my cowardice, my weakness. Our home was falling apart, and I left.

I just _left_.

" _You can't be serious, Helga!" Godric exclaimed, his temper always so close to the surface those last few days._

" _I am." Helga stood firm. Godric let out an inarticulate scream and stormed out of the room._

" _You will be missed," Rowena whispered, giving her a fleeting hug before following after Godric._

I regretted it the moment I stepped foot outside. Every step I took that carried me further and further away from our home was like a sharp blade to the heart. Still, I didn't have the courage to go back. I couldn't stand to walk those halls when one of us was missing.

If only I had been stronger then. If only I had been able to step between both of you. My life, it seems, has been reduced to 'if onlys'...

If only I had been strong enough.

If only I had said something.

If only I had interfered.

If only I had stayed.

If only...

There is nothing worse than a life of 'if onlys'. There is nothing I regret more than to have lived such a life.

In my dying hour, I want nothing more than to be back in the days where we were young and so full of hope and dreams.

" _I can't believe it's done!" Helga laughed._

" _It took a while but we did it." Salazar looked around proudly, a carefree smile painting his lips._

" _We should name it!" Godric suggested, his perpetual good mood at an all time high._

" _You want to name it while we're in the Astronomy Tower? Shouldn't that be done outside, at the front doors?" Rowena asked._

" _Astronomy Tower?" Godric quirked an eyebrow._

" _Of course, this is the Astronomy Tower," Rowena replied in a matter-of-fact tone. "It's the highest point, perfect for Astronomy."_

I will never forget the countless mornings we sat up there, all nestled close as we watched the sun rise – the soft golden light of the first dawn rays bathing us in their warmth. That tower was my favorite place in the world. It was the place I went to when I wanted to have a little peace. Of course I knew that all of you knew that I was there. The fact that you all respected me enough to not barge in, always meant the world to me. Though you also knew me enough to know when I needed you all with me.

Now that I feel my last breath approaching, I wish only to be there with all of you once more.

In my dying hour, I want for nothing more then to have lived a life without regrets.


	3. To Be With All Of You

**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J.K. Rowling. No money is being made.

 **Written for the Challenge '200 Prompts, in 100 Stories!'**

 **I picked as Additional Rewards:** The Founders - Godric, Rowena, Helga, Salazar - 2 points

 **It will consist of a small multi-chapter story.**

 **Prompt** **s** **for** **this** **chapter:**

 **Character –** Rowena

 **Other –** Two-way Mirror

* * *

 **Chapter 3 – To Be With All Of You**

To be with all of you, now that the end comes near, is everything I want. I cannot remember the last time we enjoyed each others' company. I cannot remember the last time we shared a night of laughter, nor the last time we dried each others' tears. In fact, there are a lot of things I cannot remember.

As time passed, everything started fading. I have only few recollections left. I guard them fiercely, even the ones that lead to nothing more than bitter regret.

" _You're leaving then?" Rowena asked softly._

" _I have to." Godric didn't turn around. Rowena closed her eyes, willing her tears not to fall. She needed to remain strong._

" _It's our home." Rowena took a step forward, wanting nothing more than to hold her friend, her brother,_ _almost as if in a futile, desperate desire to restrain him_ _. She stopped before reaching him when she noticed the tense set of his shoulders._

" _Not anymore."_

 _'_ _Not anymore_ _'_. Those words haunted my days for years, I cannot recollect when they stopped tormenting my every waking moment. Maybe because they never truly did. Did you truly feel that? If I didn't know you as well as I do, I would say that you did. However, my beloved brother, I do know you, and I know how much those words must have hurt you.

Both of you were as thick as thieves, him leaving broke you. It broke all of us, though none more than you. Even if you were far too proud to show it.

I always wondered if I could have done something to prevent it.

A futile thought, of course, but one I have often nonetheless.

To be with all of you back in the days where we were young, and so full of hope and dreams is my only aspiration now that my breaths are numbered.

" _What is it?" Rowena asked into the small two-way mirror._

" _We did it!" Godric exclaimed, a bright grin on his lips._

" _What he means is, I did it," Salazar interjected, a teasing smirk on his lips._

" _Boys." Helga sighed, a fond look in her eyes. "What they mean is that we finally managed to create the right enchantments to put on the quill."_

" _Oh, that's wonderful!" A delighted smile spread across Rowena's features. "We can finally find all of them!"_

I remember that small mirror with crystal-clear clarity. It is one of the few things that I could still describe to the smallest detail. The memories connected to it are some of my fondest. I can't help but wonder what all the others were like, if the ones connected to such an insignificant object were so full of happiness. Snippets of conversations filled with joy, fondness, love. Snippets of a life that with every breath I take is slipping away from me.

I fear I am losing everything that makes me, _me_. A small part of me rejoices the fact that none of you are here to see my decline.

A larger part of me regrets it bitterly.

Now that I feel my last breath approaching, I wish only to be there with all of you once more.

To be with all of you was all that I needed to have lived a life without regrets.


	4. Once More

**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J.K. Rowling. No money is being made.

 **Written for the Challenge '200 Prompts, in 100 Stories!'**

 **I picked as Additional Rewards:** The Founders - Godric, Rowena, Helga, Salazar - 2 points

 **It will consist of a small multi-chapter story.**

 **Prompt** **s** **for** **this** **chapter:**

 **Character –** Salazar

 **Other –** Clock Tower

* * *

 **Chapter 4 – Once More**

Once more, that is all I ask for. See you, talk to you, embrace you, just once more. That is all I want. Death caught up to me and, now that I am looking It in the eyes, I long for the comforting camaraderie we used to have. You were, _are_ , my brother in all the ways that matter. I regret every single word hurtled at you in anger, every unkind thought I had because of my cowardice and fear. Every moment of pain I caused, you I wish I could undo.

Even with the unfathomable, suffocating grasp of Death's presence enclosing me, already like the close walls of a coffin, and His silver frost ices into the marrow of my bones, I cannot bring myself to ask for absolution.

I regret my decisions, not my beliefs. Though now that years have gone by, and I have felt the soul-shattering pain of loneliness, I know I would put aside my beliefs in a heartbeat if it meant I could remain beside you.

What good are beliefs to me, now, if none but Death stands beside me?

I would give everything I own, everything I am, to change it.

" _Then leave!" Godric roared. It stopped them in place, the blood icing in their veins._

" _What?" Salazar's voice was nothing more than a breathy whisper._

" _If you can't be bothered to look past their muggle connections, then leave." Godric replied, his voice icy._

" _Yo-you can't mean that," Helga stuttered, tears welling in eyes bright with pain._

" _Very well."_

 _'_ _Very well_ _'_. So simple, so small, aren't they? The words that damned me to a life of bitter isolation. I do not even want to think about the pain they must have caused to our dear sisters.

I remember the days in which we, in all our youthful naivety, were filled with the conviction that nothing would tear the red threads binding our makeshift family apart. I can see it as nothing more than bitter irony that we were the ones to rend it asunder. You with your arrogance, myself with my pride.

Our greatest sins, I would say, if I believed in such a thing.

Once more to be back in the days where we were young, and so full of hope and dreams; what a delight that would be.

" _They're coming. The very first ones!" Godric chirped, and if the others hadn't know the man for as long as they had they would have marveled that such a rough looking man could sound so cheerful._

" _We know." Salazar smiled, looking eagerly at the double doors of the Great Hall._

" _Shouldn't they be here already? What time is it?" Godric asked. "Oh, I know!" Godric grinned, question already forgotten. "We should build a clock. Not just any clock either, a clock tower!"_

" _A clock tower?" Rowena raised an eyebrow, and Godric nodded energetically._

" _Alright." Salazar conceded, a fond look in his eyes. "We'll build a clock tower. Now, pay attention. They're here."_

That Clock Tower became one of my favorite places, if only because you loved it so much. I always knew where to find you, as did everyone else, mind, though I was always the one who _went_ to find you. It didn't work all that well most of the time. For being such a brash person, you were surprisingly cunning – I lost count of the times you convinced me to stay with you. It was the same number of times that our precious sisters came to fetch us, scolding us all the way – I still remember the muffled laughter of our children as we were dragged away by the ear, a chiding resonating in the gray halls.

Now that I feel my last breath approaching, I wish only to be there with all of you once more.

Once more, I wish to have lived a life without regrets.


End file.
